miercuri, 10 iunie 2009

One thing leads to another




Am doua locuri in care scriu: un jurnal pe care il tin intr-un folder pe computerul personal, in care n-am mai scris de mult si blogul acesta. Am observat ca atunci cand incerc sa compun un post, desi am ideea, de multe ori nu sunt multumita de rezultat si renunt la postare. Insa, de cele mai multe ori cand am scris in jurnalul pe care nu-l vede nimeni, am facut-o indeajuns de bine, incat sa mi se para ca as putea posta si pe blog ce am scris. Probabil din cauza lipsei presiunii psihice la care ma supun, cel mai probabil fara sa constientizez, atunci cand scriu pentru alti ochi decat ai mei. Scriind liber, de multe ori imi reuseste mai bine, decat cand stiu ca urmeaza sa-mi fac publice gandurile.

Chestia asta imi aminteste de George Carlin din nou si vorbind de el, azi am urmarit impreuna cu fratele meu ultimul lui spectacol si am realizat ceva dincolo de glume.

Nu mai petrecusem de ceva vreme timp de calitate cu fratele meu. Adica momente in care sa-l simt aproape si sa impartasim lucruri care ne plac la amandoi. Pe George stiam ca il va aprecia la aceeasi intensitate ca si mine si am profitat de ocazie pentru a ne apropia mai mult. Am petrecut o dupa amiaza impreuna, razand, bucurandu-ma ca reactiile lui sunt cele la care ma asteptam si impartasind aceeasi pasiune, acelasi mod de gandire, observand si punctand aceleasi idei, aceleasi glume. Am recuperat putin din timpul in care m-am simtit departe de el.

Dupa spectacol mi-am amintit de la cine am auzit de George Carlin. Cu George mi-a “facut cunostinta” Cristi, un prieten drag, in ultima lui zi in Galati, chiar inainte de a se muta in Bucuresti. In afara de faptul ca imi este un dor apasator de el si de discutiile noastre, mi-am dat seama ca trebuie sa-i multumesc, in mod indirect, pentru legatura pe care am recreat-o azi cu fratele meu. La fel am constientizat cat de mult inseamna George Carlin, ce a lasat in urma lui si cum reuseste o persoana care nu mai e printre noi sa atinga, inca, vietile celor ramasi in urma.

Toate aceste ganduri s-au concretizat intr-o imagine de ansamblu, a bigger picture cum ar spune englezul. Aceasta imagine se reduce la o idee subliniata de Antoine de Saint Exupery in Citadela si anume ca nimic nu se pierde si nimic nu e in van pe lumea asta. Toate folosesc la ceva, se intampla cu un folos, chiar daca invatatura o deducem mai tarziu.

George Carlin a lasat intr-adevar ceva in urma, a fost si este un nume pe care unii nu-l vor uita prea usor. Imi rasuna si acum in minte raspunsul lui la intrebarea: cum ai dori sa te tina minte oamenii, ce ti-ar placea sa spuna cand nu vei mai fi? Raspunsul lui a fost: he was here a minute ago...

Insa ideea si mai de ansamblu e ca nu trebuie sa fii o persoana publica pentru a lasa ceva in urma. E de ajuns ca o singura persoana sa-ti simta lipsa, sa insemni ceva pentru cineva si atunci legatura e facuta. Rostul tau e definit, participi la aceasta legatura intre oameni si suflete, cineva are nevoie de tine si se gandeste cu drag la tine, in timpul vietii sau dupa. Stiind asta iti gasesti linistea, aflandu-ti rostul si sensul...


Because I’ve promised to translate and I haven’t, this is an attempt to undo my bad, Kev.

I have two places where I write: a journal I keep on my PC and this blog. Haven’t written anything in the journal lately, but when I used to, I would often find myself saying: hey, this is good, I could post this one. When I intend to write on the blog I think I involuntarily put pressure on myself, as I know what I’m about to write will not be for my eyes only and that’s why most of the times I’m not pleased with the result.

All this reminds me of George Carlin again and speaking of him, I’ve watched his latest show with brother today and I realized something beyond the jokes. I haven’t spent much time with him lately and I mean quality time, where we get to connect and share states of mind, emotions, etc.

I knew he liked and appreciate George as much as I did and I took the opportunity as a chance for us to get together like the old times. As I enjoyed with him the same jokes I liked best, shared the same thoughts, same opinion on things, same view on life, I felt we had a chance to catch up on us.

After the show I remembered who introduced me to George Carlin. It was Cristi, the friend I have in Bucharest and he gave me a show with George on his last day in Galati. I remembered how incredibly much I miss him and our talks about things only few people cared about or think about.

I realized I had him to thank, indirectly for the bond I’ve recreated with brother. At the same time I acknowledge what George has left behind and how he manages still to touch people’s lives.

Then I’ve seen the bigger picture and it all comes down to something Antoine de Saint Exupery said in one of his books. It’s all about the connection of things and people. Nothing is lost forever if it lives in our hearts, no one is really gone if his life still touches people..

George was asked on a interview what would he like people to say about him after he’s gone. And he replied: “he was here a minute ago”.

But the even bigger picture is you don’t have to be a well known personality to leave something behind. And your life is worth living if you are indispensable to at least one person. If someone in this world needs you, you are part of the whole process, the connection of things. Knowing this, you can find inner peace and you can understand the purpose of your presence here…

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